


Hotel California

by HardStansOnly



Category: GOT7
Genre: Amnesia, Angst with a Happy Ending, Deja Vu, Depression, Emotional Manipulation, Eventual Happy Ending, Horror AU, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Memory Alteration, Mild Gore, Mind Manipulation, Minor Violence, Multi, Near Death Experiences, Psychological Horror, Psychological Trauma, Self-Sacrifice, Shadow people, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, established markbeom, eventual ot7, glamours, hotel california au, mild body horror, supernatural spooky shit, tags to update with story, think like haunted house levels, this shit is ominous
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:20:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27287071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HardStansOnly/pseuds/HardStansOnly
Summary: “You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave.”
Relationships: Im Jaebum | JB/Mark Tuan
Comments: 13
Kudos: 16





	1. Welcome to the Hotel California

**Author's Note:**

> who's ready for another horror concept brought to you by S and Rae? -s

Jaebum wakes up more than confused, a small _what the fuck_ slippling out of his mouth as he tries to orient himself. His whole head feels like someone stuffed it full of cotton balls after shaking it until his brain melted. When he pries his eyes open he takes stock of two things. His husband is missing, and he’s in an upscale hotel room that gives him violent deja vu.

The bed is plush like the one he and Mark got as a wedding gift from the Tuan’s but the thick down pillows smell like his mom's favorite detergent. The top blanket looks mostly like the set he had when he was a kid but is just different enough that it is plausible he's wrong. At least that’s what he tells himself as he ignores the stain on the corner of the set from when he spilled rose oil on it. When he was ten.

Not willing to entertain the implications of the bedding, Jaebum looks around and the room. Which, unsurprisingly, is the standard off-white that all hotels insist on using. Instead of white crown molding, the room is trimmed with thick slats of wood that remind him of a place that he and Mark stayed during a business trip. The hardwood floor would have been the same, save for a soft shag area rug that looks... identical to his grandma's? 

The paintings hung around the room are bland garden scapes that most hotels have. The more Jaebum looks at them the more the colors seem to bleed out until they might as well have been painted with paintballs. Above him, the too-bright lights cast things in hard shadows that Jaebum swears are a living thing. 

He closes his eyes to the eerie mishmashed room and tries to remember how the hell he ended up there. Digging, he can’t remember checking in, or the ride here or hell, even the train ride but the more he thinks the more his head hurts. Then there’s the fact that he’s in a room, on a single bed. It makes no sense why he would have a different room than Mark, they had been married five years and they were in California so it wasn’t like they had to hide anything.

If he had somehow ended up in a cheap reality show, Jaebum was going to make someone’s life miserable. And if it was Mark’s idea, he might be widowed early.

Unable to come up with any good answers, or answers at all, Jaebum climbs out of the bed. The clothes in the dresser, thankfully, are not some relic of his childhood. It’s not his travelling clothes, but at least it’s clothes that he can wear. Pulling out a black long sleeve shirt and pants that he knows died a tragic death two years prior he dresses. He stuffs his feet into converse that also died six months ago but were his favorite pair, the insides worn down just right.

Jaebum finds a little envelope that says _Room Key_ on the dresser with his driver’s license in it. And because his day isn’t weird enough, there is a note on the floor by the door, clearly having been slid through the gap beneath. In big block letters is:

**!!DON'T LET THEM FIND YOUR KEY!!**

He’s highly suspicious that someone really is just trying to fuck with him, but he tucks the envelope with his license between his mattress and boxframe before venturing out into the overbright hallway. The door doesn’t seem to lock from the outside anyway so he figures it must be part of the bit. He’ll play along until he can at least find Mark.

The place is nice. Really, really nice. It’s probably nicer than most of the production sets he’s worked on in the last few years. He follows the red floral carpet for a while and things are a little unreal. He feels the way he does when he’s dissociating, but not too hard, especially when he tries to look into reflective surfaces but finds there is never enough light to actually make an image. Even moving feels like his body is delayed to himself. The last time he felt this out of sorts was the morning after his wedding when he and Mark definitely drank too much and spent the first two days of their honeymoon nursing a hangover.

It feels like it's a whole year but finally he gets to a huge ballroom and it's even more luxurious. There's a table stacked with food and champagne on ice, all of it carefully crafted and waiting for a picture to be taken. On one side, there is a patio that looks out to the desert, lit by the full moon and a billion lights. Opposite from the patio is a fully stocked bar with a handsome man smiling at him from behind it. And finally, his eyes are drawn to a beautiful woman at the head of the table, smiling at him with teeth too sharp - but so are Mark’s so he doesn’t find that strange. Her too-sharp teeth are arguably the only thing he doesn’t find strange about her. She looks gorgeous and inviting and innocent and there's nothing outwardly off-putting about her. She's perfect. Jaebum is unsettled all the same. The only reason he doesn’t just up and leave is that Mark is standing in the middle of the ballroom in a stance that says _guard up_ to him despite how laid back he looks to anyone else.

“Hello Jaebum.” Her voice tinkles like bells and something deep in Jaebum’s bones tells him to run. A few billion years of evolution tries to make him flee from a danger that his brain hasn’t realized is in the room. “Welcome to the Hotel California.”


	2. We are all just prisoners here of our own device

Yugyeom knows only three things. That his name is Yugyeom, Bambam is his best friend, and they have been in...wherever the hell they are, for what seems like forever. Neither him nor Bam can remember what happened, where they had come from, or why they’re here. They simply exist in a never changing state in this never changing hotel, where people come and then leave abruptly. Probably. He thinks they’ve seen people. It's a hotel, so there has to be people. But they can never remember names or faces or stories. _She_ is the only constant thing here.

While She sleeps, they have explored this place top to bottom trying to figure out what the hell is going on. Right before they had been put on a short leash, they had checked every room that was available - even once finding _their_ rooms, they think. Written in a diary, they found notes hastily scribbled down in their own shaky handwriting and pages with spots as if tears had hit them.

In the diary they learned that She can't enter the rooms of the people who come in. Something about them bars Her but they can. They're the ones who write a note about the keys to each newcomer. Yugyeom is sure they must have hidden both of theirs when they first arrived, not even the diary had said where the keys were. The implication that they had been there for so long they had _forgotten_ even writing the diary terrified Yugyeom and pissed off Bambam. 

It left the question: what else had they forgotten?

They had been there hanging on Her arm like fancy decoration when Jackson and his girlfriend first came to the grand ballroom. Yugyeom could still remember how both of them were pretty and confused, as all new guests are. And just like the precious few others that Yugyeom could remember, the two fell for Her charms instantly. They were dazzled by the fairy lights that cast a hazy hypnotic glow, and the pink champagne in flutes garnished with fruits. 

Jackson and his girlfriend allowed themselves to be brought to the dance floor by Her. Allowed themselves to be fed cherries and cheeses and little snacks while flute after flute of champagne was coaxed down their throats and the two were left dazed in their seats, unaware of who they even were.

Yugyeom was the first person to notice, at least that time, because Bam was preoccupied trying to find a way out. He could see how She took the girlfriend to the bar, Jackson’s girlfriend smiling as she handed over the license in exchange for a drink but never got it back. The next day, the new woman was gone. Yugyeom would have thought maybe he had dreamt the pretty woman if not for when Jackson arrived that night, he kept asking why they were missing someone. At least until the first flute was pressed to his lips and the soft brown eyes went misty.

Yugyeom doesn't trust it. Doesn’t trust Her. So during one of the dances that night, he sidled up close to Jackson silently asking for his forgiveness. He danced hard and heavy against him despite Jackson not really wanting to dance, though clearly unable to turn down a pretty boy all but fucking him on the dance floor. When Yugyeom pulled Jackson into a deep kiss he slid his hand into Jackson's pocket to take his license. 

Jackson couldn't be taken if he didn't have a license to lose.

Yugyeom watched Her after that. Watched as She encouraged Jackson and Bambam into dancing, into kissing one another and Her. Yugyeom saw her slide up behind Jackson and run her hands over him even though he looked like he didn’t really want to do anything at all. Where Jackson had been bright the night before, he didn’t want to dance or kiss or anything.

The moment of truth happened when Yugyeom watched her hands slide over his pockets, pausing then sliding in. She searched for a moment, hands retreating out and then asking Jackson for something. 

Yugyeom and Bambam both held their breath when Jackson told Her that he must have lost it. He had searched his pockets, mumbling that he didn’t have it. He doesn't know where it went. 

All at once the lights in the room flickered, the brightness turned up until the fucking sun might well have been nestled in the chandelier. It was the first time Yugyeom could remember that she got mad. She got angry. Furious 

With a snap of a finger, she cut the music and started screaming. The tone of her voice no longer a cloying sweet but a booming snarl.

“Where is your card?” Her voice pitched again, the syllables colliding like a car crash. “Where is your key card you stupid boy, you idiot, you useless filth.” 

To their horror, as She shouted and screamed and yelled, She changed from pretty and non-threatening to beastly. The red tipped nails on her fingers extended. The too-sharp teeth in her mouth growing long and protruding. The thin frame under her dress sinking and distended. Starving, hollow, ghastly. 

_Talons. Teeth. **Hunger.**_

The words had come back to him like a long buried secret. While Jackson stood in confused terror, Yugyeom hid the card with shaking hands in his own pocket to hide later. (If he found his own card in the hiding spot he chose for Jackson. he hoped later to forget that all over again.) Just as She lifts a hand to strike Jackson, Yugyeom and Bam unknowingly take the same course they always have, always will when She gets angry. Even monstrous, they approach, coaxing her with sweet smiles and outstretched hands as though she’s still the pretty thing that dances with them each night. Between the two of them, they cajole her into a dance and a kiss and say sweet things until She’s calmed again. They accept the pink champagne She tips into their lips until they forget that she was ever angry or beastly in the first place.

Yugyeom doesn't remember it, not anymore. It had become less memory and more glazed over nightmare just like everything else here, fuzzy and faded. He doesn't remember why he has Jackson's ID written as hidden in the tattered diary, he just knows that he does. He hopes that having hidden it is something good, that Jackson won’t walk out the door never to come back like every other person who’s come.

Yugyeom didn’t know if he believed in hell before he ended up here. Even if he didn’t, he’s convinced that’s where he’s at now. Perhaps the hellfire would be preferred at this point.

*

The maknaes may not remember but Jackson remembers. Jackson remembers Her screaming. He remembers seeing Yugyeom hide his license in his own clothes. 

Jackson remembers Bambam taking Her hand and drawing her to the dance floor. The memory of the maknaes pulling her into dances and kisses so she didn't care about him anymore made him feel sick. Jackson didn’t ask for them to put themselves in danger like that, but for as much as he wants to forget like they did but he knows he can’t. Not only can’t, but he knows that if he did, if he lost himself too much, She wouldn’t keep him like she keeps them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Say hi to us on Tumblr!  
> https://bang-channies.tumblr.com/
> 
> hey kids we got a twitter:  
> S - https://twitter.com/hardstansonly  
> K - https://twitter.com/BChannies
> 
> Give Rae some love too:  
> https://twitter.com/6uglyguysandjae


	3. Some dance to remember. Some dance to forget.

Jackson is ready to take his license from the maknaes by force by the time two new people wander in. He's so tired. He doesn’t remember who he's missing but he misses someone enough that he wants to just forget. The ache in his chest is like a bullet to the heart. Yugyeom keeps saying he'll disappear if he forgets, that everyone disappears, but Jackson doesn't care. 

It's another party night, is there ever a quiet night? He doesn’t know. Probably not, if his extroverted ass is sick of dealing with people, and two new faces show up looking concerned. 

Over the rim of his gajillionth flute of pink champagne, because he can’t buy any real fucking alcohol without his ID, he takes in the new boys. They're prettier than the last few people who came through. One is tall and skinny, bright red hair with sharp eyes that somehow miss the room full of people - which is kinda bold since Jackson himself hadn’t noticed anyone but Her the first time he came in. 

Red’s fingers are tangled together with the man next to him whose shoulders are as wide as he is tall and if Jackson was single he'd be all over the both of them. Is he single if whoever he misses is gone? Does it matter? 

Probably not.

Jackson watches them approach, the firetruck red head isn't smiling despite the other and Jackson wants to laugh. She hates people like that - people who are pretty and don't smile. She'll break him though. She always does, like a child with a sturdy toy. She takes it as a challenge. Jackson finds it’s just easier to put a smile on while She's around. The hazy memory of Her becoming enraged still haunts him. 

Mark and Jaebum. He thinks those are their names. Jackson wonders if Yugyeom will take their IDs too. Or maybe it’ll be Bam this time. Will they take their names and hide them wherever the two have hidden theirs and his? Jackson wonders if they take enough will She hurt them? He hasn’t seen her harm them and it’s clear they’re her favorites, but there’s still the chance. He hopes not, they're nice kids. But in the end it doesn't matter. 

They're all stuck here until they can get out or they get taken so when he hears the the click of her heels and the music start up he just stands up and starts pulling them both to the dance floor, kisses both of them despite their shock

Jackson isn’t as drunk as he wishes he was, but he’s floaty. His head is filled with the soft bubbles of champagne that erase the hurt. He can see that She floats gracefully away from her throne at the head table, a kiss blown at the three of them before shimmering out the door. Jackson knows where she’s going, in a roundabout way at least.

She’s gone to retrieve her pets. 

It’s noticeable when Yugyeom and Bambam aren’t around since they’re most of the life in this endless hellscape. Over the days, years, centuries, that Jackson has been stuck here he’s noticed that they only ever come in with Her, although She arrives without them now and then. He would think they were an extension, some weird replication used for breaking people, if he didn’t see their little acts of defiance. If he hadn’t seen the days where one or both shuffled in nursing bruises and cold looks in their eyes.

Jackson wonders sometimes if it’s something they decided or something she decided?   
Did they sell their souls to her so they wouldn’t disappear?   
Do they do it to protect someone?   
Are they doing it to protect each other?   
How much control does she have over them?   
Does Bambam remember his real name? No one ever calls him anything else, not even Yugyeom. Is it on his ID maybe? 

When the door opens, Jackson has managed to get both Mark and Jaebum to dance but they both stop to turn and look, and Jackson looks but he keeps moving. Yugyeom looks as innocently airheaded as ever, like all the thoughts have just been pulled right out of his head and replaced with champagne bubbles. Jackson thinks maybe they have. Bambam looks a little dumb too, although there’s a sharpness to him that can’t be hidden. He knows it's not fair, but he wonders what they were like before this. 

Were they smart? Have they always been so annoyingly compassionate? 

The maknaes size up the new people bracketing Jackson as she greets them and does introductions. Yugyeom smiles brightly as he drapes himself over Bam's shoulders, long limbs that Jackson would have liked to have around him in literally any other place but this. For his part, Bam grins at them shooting off with some quip that Jackson doesn’t catch. It gets an eyebrow raise from Mark, but a laugh from Jaebum. 

When they part and move around the woman that Jackson is convinced has never been any flavor of human, they seem like they're hers. They seem like elaborate servants. The maknaes seem loyal and charming and charmed, they seem smitten when she catches the tall baby and kisses him long and slow before she lets them pass. And if it weren’t for what he knows, what he can't forget, Jackson would think they were. If not for what he knows and the way Bam catches her attention and asks some stupid, airheaded question so that Yugyeom can turn away and discreetly wipe his mouth before he grabs a bottle of champagne and chugs directly from it. Something else for him to forget along with god knows what else happens when they cross out those doors.

Yugyeom knocking back nearly a half bottle makes the red head, Mark, frown deeper. Jackson appreciates a quick study even if he knows it always ends bad for the smart ones. They always go the fastest, and it’s among the reasons he thinks the maknaes must have been pretty and dumb before too. He can see something colder settling in the man’s razor gaze even if Jaebum nudges him and a wall appears to come down. Jackson can see it for what it is, a silent conversation. Suddenly a smile stretches across the red head's face, only a few seconds before She turns to look at them. She comes up, flirts, calls them pretty. She pulls them into kisses even as their hands tighten in one another's hold. 

Jaebum lets her draw him away and it breaks Jackson's heart a little because it's clear Jaebum is trying to protect Mark the way the maknaes protect the others. 

Moving forward Jackson asks, “Hey gorgeous, can I give him a final kiss before he’s whisked away?” 

There’s a moment of hard calculation before She relents and Jackson presses forward, his hands going to Jaebum's waist. He kisses him long and deep, borderline illegal if they were in some version of the real world, until finally she pulls him away with a fake bright laugh saying they can dance later. 

As they move away, music picking up to fill the room, Mark catches him. Jackson goes soft in the arms around him, letting the man press them close. Close enough that Mark can press lips to his ear whispering, “I know what you’re looking for.” Mark slips his hands into the back pockets of Jackson’s jeans. “You won’t find them. And if you don’t want to get hurt, you'll leave your hands out of our pockets.”

Jackson relaxes at that, which clearly surprises the man. He narrows his eyes at him but Jackson doesn't defend himself. They'll figure out who the enemy is when they figure it out, telling him what he was doing wont change anything. 

A second later Yugyeom is sidling up behind him anyway and dancing on the red head with hands on his hips and asking if he'll dance with him, please? 

Mark keeps glaring at Jackson but finally he turns to the taller man and tells him only if he can be in the back. Yugyeom flushes a little, blinks in surprise and it's nice to see him caught off guard in a good way. Jackson hears him stammer out an _‘okay’_ and lets the man get behind him.

Jackson is used to the dancing, used to the filthy grind of Yugyeom's hips but he somehow looks even filthier now, and somehow shy, which makes little to no sense at all. He looks away when Yugyeom drops his head back, the way he does when he's forgetting things, when he's letting himself just dance and be and not remember. When he’s dancing like that, Jackson can almost remember that at one time the maknae must have been more than just a puppet for Her. That at one time, maybe in the same time as him, the maknaes could dance just for the love of dancing and not as a chore or a way of placating Her.

At the table he sees Bambam watching them, eating the decadent food with his feet up on the table and a little smile on his face. He tips his head to Jackson, encouraging him to come over. It’s a full enough house with the two new people, so Jackson takes this opportunity to talk with Bambam while She is distracted.

“Hey.” Jackson picks a strawberry off the side of a champagne flute and pops it in his mouth. “Night off?”

“God I wish.” Bam raises a glass to the bartender, smile still as stupid and airheaded as before but Jackson knows better now. “I don’t think Yugyeom is going to get what he needs tonight.” On the dance floor the first real smile that Jackson has ever seen on the maknae forms between the pulse of lights. “I hope the new boys were smart enough to read the note.”

Jackson has a moment to call his past self stupid. There had been a note slipped under his door too when he arrived, one that he had completely blown past until he came back shaken and afraid. As a reward for trust, and with only mild hesitation, Jackson smiles.

“They listened. I checked.” It makes Bam look up at him in surprise and then give him a sad little smile as he reaches out to hold his hand. 

“I’m glad you get it now.” Bambam looks so dangerously close to crying that Jackson aches to pull him close and try to shield him from the ever-watchful eyes. “And we're glad you’re still here.” 

“Has it always been like this?”

“I don’t know. It was always bad, but it’s worse when it’s just the two of us.” Bambam’s fingers curl painfully tight around his hand. “It’s...foggy. Fuzzy....we don't remember a lot of it, but I know that it must be bad.” Jackson can taste the spike of fear and he thinks She must too since she laughs at nothing in the middle of the dance floor. “It must be bad because it's not a blank space of things forgotten like the world outside. This...it's _static_. It’s like it's covered in champagne and bubbles and too-loud music.” 

Jackson understands even though he wishes he didn’t. The blank spots aren't something they forgot. They’re something they buried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Say hi to us on Tumblr!  
> https://bang-channies.tumblr.com/
> 
> hey kids we got a twitter:  
> S - https://twitter.com/hardstansonly  
> K - https://twitter.com/BChannies
> 
> Give Rae some love too:  
> https://twitter.com/6uglyguysandjae


	4. This could be heaven or this could be hell

Despite the fact that Jaebum feels like he’s being set up, the night carries on without any Hollywood slashers showing up, or a knife slipping between his ribs. By the time he’s led back to the table he feels drunk and dizzy. Jaebum thinks it must be something about the lights, the way they glow and flicker make the room spin. 

When they return to the table She presses a cup to his lips, the pink bubbles make his head blank out. The fizzing on his tongue makes the lights brighter and Her smile curls too sharp. It makes the red of her lips darken like the pool of blood from when Mark was thrown from...from what? 

What happened to Mark? 

Jaebum pushes the glass away, eyes searching the crowd for a tuft of screaming red hair. His husband was just here wasn't he? 

Where is _here_? 

Something must flash over his face because She frowns and Jackson tenses in his chair. 

“Have another cup, sweetness. It will help with the headache.” She lifts the glass to his lips again even as Jaebum shakes his head. 

Smile coming back to his lips, Jaebum kisses her again saying, “Sorry, the music got to me.” And if Jaebum daydreams about gargling rubbing alcohol when he got back to his room, well it only served to make his smile more genuine.

Jaebum keeps his smile tacked in place. The one that he reserves for people who piss him off but he can’t afford to tell them to fuck themselves. He has to keep Mark safe and away from Her at all costs. Jaebum’s husband is just as good at faking, years of modeling will do that, but they need Mark trying to figure out what the fuck is going on and how to get out of here. Mark is quick, smart. He’s good at getting people talking and weeding out truth from a pile of bullshit.

“Would you like another dance?” Rolling the dice again, Jaebum motions to the dance floor.

She doesn't seem convinced but before the cup can be pressed again the silver haired boy from earlier cuts in saving all of them.

“Want to switch partners? Jackson wanted another dance with Jaebum before the party ends.” Jaebum hates that he’s relieved when Her eyes finally move away from him. “It’s going to be last call soon and I haven’t danced with my favorite lady all night.”

Jaebum doesn't think it's going to work, but it does - frankly with a pout like that, Jaebum knows he would cave too. 

“Of course Bammie.” It makes Her brighten up and smile again, red nails that had begun to feel like talons in his skin releasing to pull Bambam close. “How can I deny my special boy?”

When she whisks him away Jackson is back in his space, body already moving against his, soft lips pressed against his ear. “Something is wrong.” The urge to say _no shit_ nearly makes him shake the man dancing on him. “Don’t stop, she'll be watching.” Grabbing a handful of ass, Jaebum tries to keep pace with Jackson. “Don’t drink too much and be nice to the maknaes.” Jaebum hums an affirmative, eyes watching the bartender under his eyelashes as he flirts with Yugyeom. “You need to remember this: don’t _ever_ carry your ID somewhere she can get it.” 

Jaebum is confused, more than he was before, but a pretty boy is dancing with him. Jackson grabs his face and kisses him like their tongues can pass secrets to one another. The man leads him off the dance floor, presses him up against a table and the bubbles are back. The fizz like ginger ale on his tongue skitters across his brain making his head spin. It makes all of his questions disappear then reappear.

Jaebum pulls away from the pretty boy whose name escapes him. 

Why is he kissing a stranger? Did Mark agree? Where is his husband?

With a spike of pain, Jaebum tries to head for the exit. He needs to find Mark, needs to find his husband and find out what is happening but the lights go out and the next thing he knows he's waking up alone in his hotel room.

*

Lying on the bed, he feels groggy and fuzzy. Like before, his head feels like it was stuffed with cotton to the point of breaking and then duct taped until it stabilized. He spends a long time lying on his side, trying to remember as much as he can while he waits for the world to stop spinning.

He knows he hid his ID before he left the room and he knows he met people last night. 

He knows he's married, something happened to Mark but Mark is here. Wherever here is, and if Mark is here then he’s out shooting the shit with people to gather information.

He knows there were three pretty pretty boys, and he's not supposed to trust someone but he can't remember if it was the woman or one of the boys. Maybe it was all of them.

When the room finally slows to a stop, Jaebum gets up and goes to the bathroom. Cranking up the hot water he relishes the shower, the steam that fills the room eases some of the pain. Even something as simple as washing his face makes him feel worlds better than he did before he got up. 

As he dresses, Jaebum looks out the window and he sees expansive desert and it makes him think of where Mark is from. Which shouldn’t be hard to remember, they’ve been married for _five years_ so why does he have to dig for it?

He has to dig _deep_ , in fact, because it's hard to remember. California? The other big as fuck state in the United States? No, California. 

Right?

As Jaebum realizes he's missing details, he starts to click it together. Something is wrong, very wrong.

Ripping open the drawers he goes digging for information. He finds no pen or ink or anything to write with or on. He’s being made to forget things so naturally they wouldn’t leave anything that would allow him to keep track of what’s going on. While there aren't any pens, he finds make up in the bathroom and he realizes with a twisting stomach how many mirrors are in here. The whole bathroom wall, the shower, the ceilings, the closet door.

“God, I hate this place.” Digging around the makeup kit he pulls out an eyeliner. A brand that he used as a tragic emo kid in high school that also went out of business at least a decade ago. 

It takes forever, but he finds a space on a mirror that doesn't reflect in a way that it would be visible from the door. Dragging the large bedside table into the bathroom, he stands up and twists himself so he can write on the mirrored ceiling. There is nowhere to completely hide it but Jaebum will take what he can get for now. At least until he finds a better option.

“Let’s hope you are as good as I remember.” Eyeliner in hand, Jaebum begins to write everything . 

He continues to write after his body starts cramping and he has to stop to sharpen the eyeliner. Line after line he writes everything he can remember down to the color of Mark's hair when they met, and the date of their anniversary. There are detailed descriptions about each of his cats, one for Milo, both of their families. Jaebum writes about the way it rained when they ran home from work, giggling in alcoves after they met. 

When he finishes writing about his life before, he climbs down and grabs a book from the bookshelf and he thinks he's read it, maybe, but a long time ago and he's not sure. He uses felt tip eyeliner (that is Mark’s favorite) to paint the letters now, calligraphic and squished together to save space.

**i met three boys. one had silver hair, and one was very tall, and one was so pretty. the woman had bright red lips and took him away until the silver haired one came between them. someone said to be nice to the maknaes but I don't know who said it or who the maknaes are. my ID is hidden because someone told me to hide it. the pretty boy and the woman kissed me. Mark told me to play along. The champagne makes you forget. Don’t forget too much or she’ll take you away.**

That's as far as he gets before there's a knock on the door and a pretty, pretty boy is peeking in and saying that dinner is coming up. 

“I’m not hungry.” Jaebum trains his eyes on the pretty boy so they don’t flick to the mirror full of writing.

“She likes for everyone to be there first so She can make an entrance with the maknaes.” The boy’s eyes do a quick scan of the room though it doesn’t feel invasive. Then again, he can’t remember this boy’s name, let alone if this is the person he’s not supposed to trust. “Mark is already headed to the hall. He asked me to come get you.”

“Why?”

“You drank too much.” The boy grimaces, eyes darting to something in the hallway. “You’ve been asleep for...time is weird. But it's been five days, maybe more.”

“Bullshit.” Jaebum sets the book carefully aside. “There is no way.”

“This isn’t... _Jaebum please._ ” The emphasis on his name makes something in his brain clear. A thick cloud that he hadn’t even noticed was there.

Jackson. This was one of the boys he had met. One of the ones he had kissed while dancing.

“Gimme a sec.” Jaebum kneels down with the book so he can write a quick name and description.

If there was some kind of bullshit game going on - because he desperately needed to hold onto the hope that this was some bad joke - he wasn’t going to make it easy for them. They would take him and his sanity kicking and screaming. And god help anyone if Mark managed to get to them before Jaebum. His husband had a mean right hook and far less patience than Jaebum himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Say hi to us on Tumblr!  
> https://bang-channies.tumblr.com/
> 
> hey kids we got a twitter:  
> S - https://twitter.com/hardstansonly  
> K - https://twitter.com/BChannies
> 
> Give Rae some love too:  
> https://twitter.com/6uglyguysandjae


	5. A lot of pretty, pretty boys that she calls friends

Mark knows he's in trouble after the 5th? 15th? 300th? night. It was really only a matter of time before someone caught on to his snooping. Or, as Mark has come to suspect, maybe that everyone in this place was Her with a different face.

In the days since Jaebum has been ko’d in his room, unresponsive to everything including a slap to the face, Mark has been doing more exploration of the place they’re stuck in. Even from the first night it’s evident that time means nothing where they’re at. The sun is always shining when he looks out the windows, the moon is always up when they go to Dance Night even though it's always dance night and there is no way 12 hours could have passed in the short walk from his room room to the patio. Mark never was one for believing in aliens or demons but without literally any other logical explanation he’s forced to concede they are in some other space of reality.

Or hell.

Sometimes, usually when he’s watching Jackson try to drown himself in bottles or the maknaes try to protect one another from too sharp nails, Mark thinks they’re in hell. 

After the first night Mark and Jaebum spent hours sitting in Jaebum’s room writing out every memory between them. Siblings, parents, dates, arguments. Mark pushes both of them until their heads hurt to make as much of a timeline of their lives as possible in written form so they don’t forget. Out of sheer curiosity, Mark had them begin to write down what they remembered when they returned to their rooms at night to see if it was only things in the Before Here that they were losing. 

Originally, it had felt silly to do it but now it feels like an auto-save. Because it wasn’t just Before things that were missing. There are pockets of time since they arrived that have been completely blanked out. Each time Mark returns to his room at night he reads what he has recorded down and puts a small dot next to things that are ‘new’. Things that had been forgotten in the span of a few hours. Despite their best efforts they're still missing things, _important things_ , but they keep writing. To not write feels like rolling over and letting Her win, which Mark refuses to do because even slightly amnesic he’s fueled by spite.

Mark knows they have IDs, somewhere. He can’t remember where they hid them and that's fine with him. He must have written where the IDs were since there is a blacked out spot in his notebook, but he’s in no rush to remember. She can't force it out if he doesn't remember. He thinks She has tried to force him once, the bruises on his arm are all the proof he needs for that.

*

The moon hangs in the sky from where they're out on the patio listening to some wailing song about lost love when a new face arrives. The man looks small and confused, dazzled like they all were with Her on the first day. Even from across the room Mark can see the ID poking out the top of the back pocket, too close to Her claws for Mark’s personal comfort. 

He pushes off from the table to saunter over to where Yugyeom is dissociating into a glass of shitty champagne. As he passes the new man who is captivated by the lights, Mark wholeass picks his pocket for the ID card when he walks by and palms it to Bambam. Better for ‘Youngjae’ to have a few bones broken and stay alive than to disappear like the last person to come through. They can’t save them all. 

The whole thing, frankly, goes a little too smoothly for Mark’s frayed nerves. Even if She is distracted kissing his husband, Mark won’t put it past Her knowing he swiped the man’s ID. As long as he can keep her from questioning Bambam until the maknae can use the champagne to forget, they’ll be in the clear.

Probably.

“You look so _handsome_ tonight Beommie.” Mark remains smiling even as she rakes her fucking claws down his husband’s chest. It makes his skin itch to see Her all over Jaebum, which is clearly why She’s doing it. It’s a test or a punishment, probably both considering she _clearly_ hates Mark. “Good enough to _eat_.”

When Mark agreed to be polyam, this was not what they had in mind. To be honest Mark doesn't mind the pretty boys all over them, if they were in an actual hotel instead of this place he would be actively flirting back, but they’re in this hellscape and She is clearly pulling all the strings. It’s unbalanced, and _No_ is not a word that is in her vocabulary. If they ever unravel the mystery of this hellhole and get out, Mark figures he owed the three pretty boys at least dinner for their efforts. 

As the night drags on the lights flicker until they grow too bright and they catch sight of the things around corners with empty eyes. Things that scurry away in fear when She gets too close and Mark wonders if they were here too. If this is what happens when She gets her hands on someone’s ID.

" _You’re too smart Mark._ " The words sound like honey in his ear before his head bursts in pain. 

*

When Mark wakes up again it isn't in his plush hotel room. He’s not on the soft bed that was a replica of his sister's from when they were children and he'd sneak in when he had nightmares. This room is grey and dingy as if it’s some kind of fucked up crawlspace. In the dim light Mark sees there is blood on the wall and pieces of something strewn across the floor. 

“This is the shittiest horror movie room I’ve ever seen.” Mark tries to ignore the blood and viscera to see if there are any doors. Naturally, there aren’t.

However, with a jolt that sends his heart punching into his throat, he realizes he’s not alone. 

“At least we don’t have to saw off a foot to get a key.” The words bubble out in a nearly manic laugh even though it’s not shared by his new roommate.

“I’m Jinyoung, you must be Mark.” Sitting in a corner just outside the light is another boy. Black haired and dark eyed and just as beautiful as everyone else in this place. “Looks like you figured out her game.” Mark glances down at the shredded pieces of meat on the floor but Jinyoung isn’t bloody so Mark hopes that means it wasn’t his doing. “Are the maknaes still up there?” 

Mark nods and Jinyoung grimaces.

“I was kinda hoping they'd cave by now, but of course She's been keeping them.” Slowly, Jinyoung stretches out but makes no move to get up or approach. “It's a punishment you see, because we figured her out and She figured us out. Now they're her pets while She pretends to not see them work against her to draw out the game.”

Unable to stop himself, Mark asks, “What is this room? Some kind of closet?”

“Somewhere within whatever fake space this place exists in.” Jinyoung shrugs a single shoulder. “She can't eat us, not like She eats the others who go missing. At least, not until She has our IDs.” Mark already hates the train of logic this is going down. “Instead of dying we get to sit here, listening to them and knowing what happens but unable to do anything. We’re stuck in this limbo inside limbo until She either finds our IDs and eats us or, I assume, we die. ”

“What’s special about the IDs?” Mark has his suspicions but if they ‘figured it out’, he’d like to know their theory.

“What’s on your driver’s license?” Jinyoung’s eyes flick up and when Mark doesn’t answer, he continues. “Personal information right? Name, date of birth, address.”

“She feeds off identities. We don’t forget the memories, she eats them.” Mark runs a hand through his hair. It was the conclusion he had started to come to.

“That’s what we figured.” Jinyoung stretched a knee to crack it. “Couldn’t prove the memory thing, but we saw the bartender checking ages and holding the ID as a tab. Next night, poof.” Jinyoung snapped his finger. “They were gone. I couldn’t tell you how many people came and went before I woke up here. We’re in an isolation box unless she wants us to see things.”

“If we don’t have food or water here, can we die?” Jinyoung shrugs again, pointing to a wall of violent red tally marks. “The hell are those?”

“I started these the day I was thrown in here.” The sight makes Mark's stomach plummet. There are 200 tallies on the wall. Maybe more. “And each time I hear the music I make a new one. It’s the closest to keeping time that I got.”

As if to spite them specifically, the music starts up in a sickening tone that makes them cringe. Jinyoung, dutiful as the maknaes Mark woefully underestimated, frowns as he dips his finger in the red around them and makes another tally

“You’ve been here a while then.” Mark stands and begins pacing, asking questions at a rapid fire rate. Even if Jinyoung didn’t have the whole picture maybe he had pieces that Mark could add to his own. “Why are we here? Why us? Why anyone?” 

“I don't know.” Jinyoung leans against the wall but watches him pace. 

It’s the same kind of apathy that made Mark want to shake Jackson. Depending on how long he and Jinyoung share their cell, Mark might actually shake him. By the tally marks, Mark tries to give some sympathy to him. 200+ nights with only your own company while knowing the evil that’s happening outside would be enough to drive anyone to madness or worse, break them down. But Mark isn’t ready for that kind of defeat yet. Not when there are now 5 people stuck in that shitty ballroom with Her that Mark might still be able to save.

“You said that this was a punishment right? That being her arm candy was theirs? ” Mark pauseds gaze returning to Jinyoung. Were two maknaes three at one time? “Who are the maknaes? Did you know them?”

Mark can’t prove that She takes them in pairs, but it seems more and more that She likes to hunt groups. Picking off people one by one to drive the fear up. 

“We were... dating, once.” Off to the side one of the walls begins to turn glassy like a mirror. “I don't think they remember me anymore.” In the glass Mark can see Jaebum already floating to her arms and wonders how long it will take for him to go mad or break. “Honestly? I don't know if they remember each other anymore.”

“Are they just protecting the others because it's all they can remember? Or what they remembered you doing?” Mark tears his gaze from the glass to look back at Jinyoung. “If you’re here it's because you figured it out, right?”

“No, I expect not.” Jinyoung smiles a little sadly, tears showing even in the dim light. “But yes, that's why I’m here. I’m too smart. Just like they're smart too.” Finally Jinyoung approaches the mirror. “She used to make me watch from the mirrors while She shoveled champagne into the men I love.” The open palm resting against the smooth surface traces the two figures of the maknaes. “My sweet boys. She drowns them in that shit and makes them forget and kisses them like they're hers.”

“Like she’s doing to Jaebum.”

“She took me away thinking I was the one that made them smart, because she clearly doesn’t think they have a brain cell between them.” Finally a shadow of a smile tugs at Jinyong’s lips. “Once she threw me here, they were compliant and sweet and airheaded like she wanted. But I saw Bam catch onto her game.”

That doesn’t surprise Mark. The older of the two maknaes seems much like Mark himself, too smart to be wandering around complacent as a beaten dog. Mark thinks it must be that she wants the two as a packaged set, otherwise the silvered haired man would no doubt be here with them. 

Maybe Bambam _had_ spent time in a place like this and that’s why he’s so compliant. Maybe it’s Bambam’s unwillingness to leave Yugyeom alone with her that keeps him docile. Either way, if they ever get out Mark mentally adds Jinyoung to their list of pretty boys to buy dinner for. If the three hadn’t figured out as much as they did and took a risk to leave warnings, neither Mark nor Jaebum or Jackson would have survived long enough to fight back.

“Bammie knows more than he lets on, and if Bam knows it then Yugyeom knows it.” Jinyoung continues to burn the images of his boyfriends into his mind. “She knows they know, but as long as they keep playing along with her and opening up like flowers and giving her sweet distractions, She'll keep them at her side.” 

For a long time the two lapse into silence watching ‘dance night.’ Mark watches as Jaebum works in cycles with the maknaes while Jackson must be having an apathetic night considering the man is drinking directly from a bottle.

“Sometimes I wonder if She would eat them at all.” Jinyoung whispers when the lights dim and the glass returns to being an opaque wall. “If She had the chance, if they just handed their cards over with no hesitation, would She eat them or just devour the last little bit of their personalities and make them the shells they pretend to be?”

If Mark had his way, they wouldn’t have to worry about that. Somehow or another, he would get out of this shitty sub-sub-pocket of reality and back to where he could do something to help them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Say hi to us on Tumblr!  
> https://bang-channies.tumblr.com/
> 
> hey kids we got a twitter:  
> S - https://twitter.com/hardstansonly  
> K - https://twitter.com/BChannies
> 
> Give Rae some love too:  
> https://twitter.com/6uglyguysandjae


	6. Running for the door

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> !!!!!! violence starts to pick up from here and into the next few chaps !!!!!!

Each ‘day’ he gets up, Jaebum keeps to a routine. Shower, dress, re-read the notes scrawled on the wall and in the book that he has been keeping record in. When the mission bell goes off signalling for them to go to the ballroom he re-reads everything as fast as he can. Things stay with him but Mark being gone is agitating him, and the longer his husband is missing the more volatile he gets.

According to his journal it's been ten days since Mark has been seen by anyone. The worry and the fear has begun to make him reckless. Jaebum can't make himself focus the way he wants, the way he _needs_ to. Jackson, bless him, has been trying to calm him but it's not working because Mark couldn't be gone. Mark can't be gone because Mark didn't give her his ID and Jaebum knows it. Mark would never just up and let himself be bait like that without telling him. Moreover, Jaebum would not have allowed Mark to do it alone. And if by some weird reasoning Mark was able to convince him, Jaebum would have written it down so he wouldn’t forget.

At the table the new boy is here - Youngjae. Jaebum has spent several nights with him trying to break through the disbelief at someone telling them that they’ve fallen into a parallel dimension. The only thing that can really convince him is time, which Jaebum suspects they don’t have. Once She figured out that Youngjae didn’t have his ID the bartender disappeared in a literal blink of an eye. The next night the whole bar was gone leaving them all shaken at the sudden change.

“Hey Jaebum.” Youngjae inclines his head as Jaebum passes. “She’s not here yet.”

She’s not here and the maknaes aren't here and _Mark isn't here._

At the last ring of the bell, the door opens and She steps in with the maknaes in tow, a sweet smile on her face. The pair behind her are looking even more delicious than usual, like they're dressed up for a celebration. Jaebum wants to wonder about it but he can't focus on anything but Mark being missing for so long. He's about to ask about it but then something flickers on Yugyeom's face, something upset and he looks around, looks around some more. 

“Shouldn't there be someone else? Shou....” She freezes and turns to him even as Yugyeom’s soft voice dies under her gaze.

“No, there's no one else sweetness.” She coos into his ear, red lipstick already smearing across Yugyeom’s cheek. “There's no one else we need, everyone is here.” 

Yugyeom still looks confused and now Bambam looks panicked. Jaebum has never seem either of them look anything but pretty and dumb but now there’s fear there. The sheer amount of it would be palpable if She wasn’t clearly feeding off of it. The shiny black eyes are all dilated pupils, like a shark in bloody water. She doesn’t need to eat the food laid out on the tables because she’s been harvesting her meals from the tattered remains of the maknaes.

“No, someone is missing.”Yugyeom insists, trying to pull away. “Something is missing, something is wrong. What happened? Why can’t I remember?” She hushes him, coos at him, and Jaebum watches in a little bit of horror as Yugyeom gets more and more worked up. “Someone is missing, there should be someone else here, where is he?” 

Jaebum can only watch as She pushes Yugyeom down into a chair with the kind of controlled strength Her frame shouldn't have. The room watches, their bodies frozen in fear as She tips a glass of champagne into Yugyeom's mouth, and when he doesn't drink She grabs his jaw hard enough to bruise and the dark nails look sharp. She forces his mouth open and pours the champagne and it's too much. Jaebum knows physically the glass can't hold that much, but She keeps pouring and Yugyeom is coughing. The youngest of them is _drowning._

A steely knife flashes, bright silver and She whips around with a mouth that opens too wide. The handle of the knife is in her back, blade buried too deep to have not killed the beast in woman’s clothing. Bambam is the only one close enough, the only one who could have done it, and the thick ooze coating one hand is enough that it confirms he wounded Her. 

“Enough. Do not hurt him.” Bambam’s voice is dark, nearly as much as the rage rolling off that is also feeding Her. “That's the deal, you don't hurt Yugyeom.”

She looks between them and laughs. She keeps laughing and the room echoes with it and Jaebum's head hurts. She lashes out, grabs Bambam by his silver hair and wrenches his head back to pour champagne into his mouth too and then Jackson is grabbing his hand and Youngjae's to drag them out. 

They run and run down the corridor, past too many rooms that say Vacant, trying to find the passage back to the place they were before. They run until they're fully lost and there's things hiding in the shadows with hungry eyes. Things that Jaebum knows that Mark had talked about days before he was taken.

When they reach a checkout desk they halt because none of them have seen anything beyond endless hallways and the ballroom. 

“Relax.” The nightman behind the counter smiles. “Do you want to check out?” 

“Yes?” The three look at one another, baffled. “ I guess? 

“Of course.” The night man smiles a little more and starts getting out a book. When the night man smiles again it's with the same too large smile that She has. “You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Say hi to us on Tumblr!  
> https://bang-channies.tumblr.com/
> 
> hey kids we got a twitter:  
> S - https://twitter.com/hardstansonly  
> K - https://twitter.com/BChannies
> 
> Give Rae some love too:  
> https://twitter.com/6uglyguysandjae


	7. They livin' it up at the Hotel California

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> !!!!! gore and violence warning !!!!!

With the book out on the table, with his too wide smile and too sharp teeth, the nightman slides a pen across. The pages are pristine. There’s no writing in it when Youngjae reaches forward and flips the pages. All of them are blank, unused. Across the top, it tells them what they’ll need to fill in. Name. Address. Height, weight, eye color, gender, birthdate. Jackson is the one to drag them away. It’s a flimsy trick, but they’re not desperate enough to hand the information over just like that. 

After that the hotel becomes more imposing to be in, the only place that remains unchanged is their rooms. Jaebum walks the hallways now and the carpet is threadbare, the paint bubbles. The pictures of gardenscapes have become mirrors. 

There are always eyes watching in the mirrors. Which should freak him out, (low key they do) but he stares into them wondering if any of them are Mark’s. If the soft browns that appear like shitty a Scooby-doo movie could belong to his absent husband.

The dilapidation is reserved for the hallways, and alcoves but the patio is still lively. She still holds court there, but the veneer is chipping away. The maknaes are now kept firmly at her side at all times while she smiles with teeth sharp and nails sharper. The fairylights that hung above are busted with no shine, the music grinds off pitch in tones that make him nauseous just being there. The food and drinks remain the same so Jaebum figures they must be hers too. 

He can’t help but wonder if this space is Hers and Hers alone then what is the rest of this? What _is_ this place? . 

Days later, when it's clear that the maknaes are too fucked out of their skulls from the champagne to allow her to feed, the walls in the hotel begin to deteriorate. The panels are falling off and paint is peeling in long strips. 

“I can make it better.” Jaebum watches from the other side of the door. He’s afraid that if he goes into the ballroom he’ll never be able to escape it. “Beommie, I can fix it but I need something first.” Jaebum’s eyes roll in annoyance so far in his head he has to hope they won’t get stuck. “I need the keys. I know Mark hid them all but I cant enter Mark's room.” 

“Go fuck yourself.”

“I can’t enter but you can.” She smiles, soft and beautiful as the first day he arrived. For the first time She takes her nails and drags them down Yugyeom's cheek, spilling blood and making him scream even as it heals. Bambam is still as stone while nails sink just a little, into his throat and dangerously close to his windpipe. “And until you do, the maknaes will suffer.”

When She realizes that She cannot properly leverage with them She takes Jackson too. 

Then Youngjae.

Jaebum chokes on the guilt as he spends days listening to the men’s screams across the hotel, and he hates it but if he gives Her their IDs they're all dead. If he breaks now she’ll kill him, Jackson, and Youngjae before likely killing the maknaes. It's what he has to tell himself at night when their voices wake him in the middle of the night.

It's a stalemate.

Sometimes Jaebum thinks he can see Mark in the mirrors on the ceiling, curled up in the corner of some small dark room. He thinks it's a taunt because after days (months?) of this, She offers an exchange. 

“Give me the maknae's ID and I'll return Mark.” 

Jaebum laughs. It's a crass and broken thing. even if Jaebum did believe her Mark would never forgive him. In the time he’s been in this hellhole he’s never even bothered looking for the IDs. He’s never even been into Mark's room because the temptation will be too much.

Now Jaebum sits on the rotting patio watching the four hostages in a constant state of bleeding and healing. Jaebum watches them suffering but none of them give her the satisfaction of begging. 

Jaebum thinks this must be the first time She's experienced this kind of rebellion. It makes her agitated and makes her lash out but She's limited in what She can do. All her power is in this room alone. She cant follow him out into the hallways or into his room. She can't make him do anything or mess with his brain after the initial weirdness of _not_ eating passed and he realized he didn't need to. If he doesn't need to eat, maybe he doesn't need to sleep. Not like her, She needs the time to rest, to rebuild her power. 

Each day, Jaebum experiments more and more with what rules of this reality he can bend to give himself a better chance to fight back. One thing he finds is that he may not need to eat or sleep, but if he stays away from his room too long he starts to forget. Not in the same way the champagne would make him forget, there are no bubbles or fizzing inside his head, instead the memories fade out like a movie projector with a dying bulb. A slower, less effective process that might have once been what happened to people here. 

Refusing to be baited to return to the ballroom, Jaebum begins a new kind of exploration of the hotel. One by one, he starts making his way through the rooms, most of them empty, some he wishes were empty. He finds pieces of lives lost and ruined behind the doors that say Vacant. He finds pieces of what he thinks were people, or people shaped, though it’s hard to imagine the pieces had ever fit together. 

For all the blood, and sometimes guts, that he finds in rooms to rival the horror movies he and Mark watched together, the rooms with no lights scare him the most. The rooms that say Vacant but he walks in only to find eyes staring back at him in the mirrors, wide in terror and unblinking. Those rooms are completely barren of anything that could show him who once owned it. Even the forms in the mirror are devoid of characteristics. Each time he finds a Dark Room, he promises the eyes in the mirror that he’ll find a way to kill her. For all of them.

When exiting each room he marks the doors with a smear of makeup so he doesn't lose precious time going into places he's already been. Jaebum can’t help but think that maybe if he can find Mark, they can figure this out together. Mark has always been better at puzzles, and has likely figured this place out. It’s why Jaebum is convinced Mark was taken instead of him. He hopes that Mark at least got a shot in as she dragged him away.

*

The worst is the night he opens a door marked Occupied. Despite the difference, it’s unlocked like all of them, and there's no eyes like the others. Someone is watching, but it's not wide eyes in the mirrors that he’s grown used to seeing, it's not a Dark Room so they can’t follow him in. The room is someone's though, and it's fresh, used recently.

Jaebum sees there's a stuffed animal on the bed, some white thing he can't remember the name of and there are books on the floor, skinny jeans with the knees cut out slung over the back of the chair. There's a pair of dress shoes at the end of the bed and rings and necklaces on the desk where they were taken off. He takes a step in and realizes this is one of the maknae's rooms. They must be together in another room, and he doesn't know which one this belongs to. The clothing and jewelry could belong to either one honestly. 

The books on the floor are weird though. They look like things he would read. High literature. Kafka. Murakami. Classics translated from several different languages. He realizes a little belatedly that maybe he doesn't know much about the maknaes at all. He didn't know they liked to read, not that much anyway. Jaebum has read many of the books lying around and knows that many of them are _dense_ even for him. Then again, if the maknaes have been on a diet of terror, doped up on pink champagne and unable to return to their rooms, the Bambam and Yugyeom he knows could be a complete 180 from how they had been before. 

When he sits on the bed he feels it, the way someone is watching him. He looks in the mirror and sees the vague shadow of a man, but he can't make out much more than that. Instead of dwelling on the shadow, he keeps looking around. It’s...not impressive. Nothing any more or less grand than his own room. One notable difference is this one has pens in it, and a school desk with worksheets. Leaning across to the desk, he reaches over to grab a notebook to flip through. On the first page the realization hits him like a brick. This isn't the maknae's room. It’s an echo of someone with touches of their maknaes in it. Someone who has been missing but not dead and that gives him hope for finding Mark. It’s the only indication of someone living past being taken to the master’s chamber.

When the remainder of the pages are empty he goes to the other books, flips through them and puts them aside when he finds them empty too. In a stack on the floor he finds a book of poetry, lots of space in the margins, and hits jackpot. 

In the book are facts listed, just like the ones he and Mark have been writing, in tiny script Jaebum can barely read. He curls up on the floor and dives in, ignoring the feeling of being watched by the shadow that must be the owner of the room. He wonders if the maknaes know about this guy, if they have gone out of their way to help him as much as they’ve been helping the rest of them. He had a family. sisters. Do they just hole up here when they can? Do they have rooms they go to or do they just go with Her? He's never seen them away from her, literally at all. 

When he gets past the recounting of this Jinyoung person's life before, he gets to the part listing facts about the other two. Bambam and Yugyeom. Their ages. Their birthdays. 

**“Yugyeom is the youngest by a few months, which seems impossible when you look at them but makes sense when you think about it. Yugyeom's favorite thing is dancing, he likes Moomin, he wants to be a singer even though he's better at dancing.”**

“Moomin! That’s what the white thing is.” Jaebum glances up at the fat stuffed animal wondering if Yugyeom ever got the chance to come in here and hold it. How many tears were dried on the soft material after they arrived.

**“BamBam is from thailand and he likes spicy foods and hates fatty things, he loves Black Panther”** (Jaebum can't remember what that is but he inherently knows it doesn't mean the animal.) **“and cats. Bam can't sing for shit but he's a good rapper and they were getting singing lessons together. his real name is Kunpimook Bhuwakul and his mother gave him the nickname. ”**

As he reads more, Jaebum sees that the two are the loves of Jinyoung’s life, that there are a dozen written promises that he's going to find a way to get them out of here. It makes Jaebum’s own heart ache for the three, especially the two that have been made to forget someone who clearly adored them.

On the next few pages, Jinyoung details seeing Yugyeom dancing and being infatuated and the maknae pursuing him by being as annoying as humanly possible. He details every second of trying to court him and when Bambam got jealous, thinking he was trying to steal his best friend Jinyoung started dating them both. He details how they both kiss and what their skin feels like and how Yugyeom looked older and Bambam was still a baby when they met. There are descriptions about all the hairstyles they’ve gone through - most sounding incredibly unfortunate if not hilarious to imagine.

When Jaebum hits the end of the book he scrambles for another and flips through until he finds a workbook where the pages are filled with writing instead of filled in questions.

**“The champagne makes them forget. She likes my boyfriends too much, She likes them more than She likes the others, or than She likes me.**

**Yugyeom’s hair used to be honey blonde but it's black now. I don't remember what night it happened. Bambam came in with black hair but it's silver now. Their hair has changed, I know it has but they don’t remember how. I feel like i’m going fucking crazy.”**

Jaebum can feel the fear and desperation in the increasingly shaky writing. He reads about how She fed the two champagne until they forgot who he was. She told him they belong to her now.

**“She holds them down and makes them drink if I act up, sometimes even when I don’t. She makes them dance for her. She dresses them up on nights She wants something. She gives them to new guests like a gift, and I can’t do anything about it.**

**She was gentle with them once, but now She bites Bam's lips and grabs Yugyeom's jaw. they know too much because of me and She doesn't like it. I don't know what's going to happen. They already hid the keys but I’m afraid that they'll forget why they need them. I’m afraid they'll find them and forget they need to be a secret.**

**I’m so tired of holding them while they cry without remembering why they're scared. I'm tired of remembering things that I wish I could forget.**

**Maybe I’m dead. Maybe this is hell. Maybe if I just gave it up I could get to rest, but I don't know what would happen to the men I love if I do that so I can't.”**

Jaebum gives himself a few minutes to grieve for not only Jinyoung, but the two maknaes who lost themselves trying to protect the man they loved. When he picks himself up from the desk, the shadow of a man is still watching. 

“I don’t know if you can hear me Jinyoung.” Pressing a hand to the glass, Jaebum holds the shadow’s gaze. “I’m going to find a way to save us. All of us. She...She has Jackson and Youngjae. She has the maknaes but She doesn’t have me. Not yet.” Pressing his forehead to the glass he whispers, “if Mark is with you...tell him I love him.”

Jaebum makes his way back to his room, the telltale pain in the back of his head showing that he has been away from his room too long. He wonders if he stays out long enough if he’ll blackout and if that is what returned him to his room before. If the food and drink that are in the ballroom negate the effects, at least temporarily, or if She has another way of keeping the others from returning like he did. There is too much at stake now to experiment, but it would make sense. Being away too long resulted in memory loss, or being potentially eaten. It would only be fair that there was some kind of safety measure that would give them a shot at surviving. Nothing has been fair so far, but that was when they were playing by her rules. Jaebum is ready to make his own now. 

The things he finds in Jinyong’s room give him an idea, something simple that he hopes will give him another edge. He focuses on his life as he walks back. He recalls with as much attention to the small details on what he and Mark were before this nightmare. He had been writing new songs, his work desk packed with notebooks and pens. He focuses on Mark’s work station next to his, filled with pictures of their friends and family, including a picture from their wedding that showed them drunk in a fountain with fucked up suits but grinning like hyenas.

Pushing open his door, Jaebum gives out an audible whoop of triumph. Inside his room there are now notebooks on a desk that hadn't been there before with pens of varying colors. Pictures sit on the desk with faces that are near enough to count as a win. The melted gardenscapes on the wall now show the paintings in his studio, including the one that Mark’s niece made for them. The bed remains in the middle of the room though it’s no longer a collage of things from the past. It’s so close to looking like his room at home that the only thing missing which could convince him that he’s out is, of course, his husband. Peeking around the corner, he can see the makeup on the mirror from the first time he wrote, unchanged despite the room’s metamorphosis.

Pouring himself into the chair, he writes down what he learned about Jinyoung and the maknaes. He writes down the conversations he’s had with the two, writes about Jackson and Youngjae. Maybe by sheer force of will he can keep them from disappearing like Mark and Jinyoung did. Jaebum is careful that he doesn’t write about Her. It feels like things have shifted to End Game time and he doesn’t want to risk it summoning her or something to the only safe haven he has. 

Jaebum writes everything until he's out of pages and then wills new books into existence. 

He doesn't think he's dead, doesn’t think any of them are. His, Jackson’s, Youngjae’s and Mark’s rooms are still lit, still full of things just like Jinyoung’s room. The 'meat rooms' are probably people still being consumed, digested, or whatever the fuck happens when their ID is taken. Which leaves the Dark Rooms which, as far as he can tell, are people who are gone. Trapped. Maybe forever stuck here even in their death. 

He wants to help them, all the shadows and eyes that watch him, but his first priority is saving the four kept leashed at her feet. Then Mark. And if, a BIG if, he's still alive, Jinyoung.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Say hi to us on Tumblr!  
> https://bang-channies.tumblr.com/
> 
> hey kids we got a twitter:  
> S - https://twitter.com/hardstansonly  
> K - https://twitter.com/BChannies
> 
> Give Rae some love too:  
> https://twitter.com/6uglyguysandjae


	8. I had to find the passage back to the place I was before

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> !!!! gore and violence warning !!!
> 
> Part 1 completed!   
> Thanks for sticking around! Part 2 will posted soon!

aebum is sure that She’s caught on that he’s cracked the code. It’s been days, weeks maybe, since he’s gone to the ballroom. He doesn’t have the ability to help the others yet and by showing up it means they’ll suffer extra for Her show. Not that it seems to spare them pain, the hallways are usually filled with screaming followed by ugly laughter to taunt him.

Jaebum nearly has the time he needs to ‘rest’ and the time limit he has to be out of his room down to a science. Every time he’s able to go further since the black X on the doors down the hall keeps him from going into the same room twice. He’s nearly at the end of the hallway when he enters a room that makes his body shake. Something that he hasn’t done in several trips. 

The room is empty, at least he can see. No bits of what used to be a person like he’s used to but the walls are made of mirrors. On the wall written in sticky, never drying blood are tally marks like someone had tried to keep time and pleas for help in the same deep red. 

**SHE CAN’T KEEP ME LOCKED IN HERE FOREVER**

**GOD HELP ME**

**SOMEONE HELP ME**

**Mama i’m sorry**

and then finally: **"hidden in the coat room."**

Someone had been here, locked away by Her and had given up. They had told Her where their ID was hidden and been consumed. Jaebum wonders if Jinyoung and Mark are kept in rooms like this.

Ready to close the door he nearly shouts when the light catches and someone is pressed to the glass more real than any shadow he’s used to. In the glossy surface Mark is staring at him, eyes red rimmed, no smile where he’s used to seeing the upturned lips. He’s not sure if it actually is Mark or if this is a new taunt, but Jaebum takes a moment to take in his husband before closing the door. 

In the corner of his eye he catches a figure moving in the hallway and goes cold all over again. His stomach churns thinking She must have finally found a way out. Leaned against the wall two doors down is a woman with bright orange hair. She steps close, tired eyes taking him in warily. Jaebum takes a step back but she laughs sounding as manic as Jaebum is sure he sounds these days. 

“It's been a long time since I’ve seen someone new.” The woman looks him over again thoughtfully. “Twice as long since I’ve seen someone who isn't under the thrall.” 

“Must be special I guess.” Jaebum mentally kicks himself in the ass for not bringing a weapon. He’d gotten so used to being the only thing walking around this side of the mirrors that he’d left himself mostly defenseless. Mark would have smacked him upside the head for not thinking ahead.

“Spunky too. She probably hates you.” The woman smiles again, both of them slowly relaxing. “My name is Jamie and I've been here for two years. I think. Time moves weird but the check out desk has my date of arrival and that’s about all I have to go on.”

“Jaebum.” To his surprise the shadows around them are missing and he can’t help but wonder if she made a pact with them, or if they were scared of her since he’s never been able to shake them. “I’ve been here...I don’t know. Two months? Maybe longer?”

“So how'd you end up in a coma?” 

“A what?” Jaebum frowns, clearly confused. “I’m not in a coma.” 

“How else would you have ended up here?”She snorts, clearly trying not to laugh.

Jaebum shakes his head. “I came with my husband.”

“I came with my wife. Others have come in with their kids, their friends.” Jaebum couldn’t argue, Jackson had come in with his soon-to-be wife apparently, and Jinyoung had fallen in with both of his boyfriends. It seemed like this place wasn’t picky but preferred to hunt groups. Something else Mark had probably figured out. “Accidents can happen to two people at once.” The sass makes his eyes tear up, it's the first real interaction he's had in who knows how long. 

“Fair point.” Nodding to the room he asks, “who was in there?” 

“Couldn't tell you.” Jamie shrugs, clearly as numb to the carnage here as Jaebum has become. Maybe more since she had been in the horror hotel longer than him. “There are countless people here in some form or another. Some are still being eaten, some dead. A few like us, still alive and able to move around.” Jamie points to a few shadows clustered, these ones without eyes where the others Jaebum had seen had them. “The eyeless shadows are people whose bodies died before She could eat them, and they're trapped here until something happens.”

“Do you know the way out?” It's a stupid question, and they both know it, but he asks anyway because it's not a dangerous question. 

“The only way out She knows is to give her the card.” The _and die_ remains unspoken between them. “If I knew how to get out, I'd have fucked off ages ago.” That makes Jaebum smile, hand lifting to cover his lips as she rolls her eyes. “I’m sure you’ve noticed the windows aren't real. If you haven’t tried yet, I’ll save you the trouble and tell you the door at the front doesn’t open.”

“Youngjae tried a few times.” Jaebum still had nightmares about the absolutely unhinged laugh the nightman gave when they used every piece of furniture they got their hands on to try and open the door.

“I’ve seen people stab Her but She never dies. Shit, I’ve tried to stab Her with anything that I could wield.”

“You should meet my husband. You’d both get along great.” Jaebum could only imagine the chaos the two could get into if allowed to hang out. “Has this place always been like this?”

“Sorta? She’s always been cruel and hurting people, she feeds off of pain, then She found pretty playthings. Since She wanted to keep them, She had to change.” From a pocket, Jamie pulls a notebook. “I started to keep records when I realized the drinks were spiked. There isn’t a champagne that’s ever been able to get me as wasted as Hers.” 

“I’ve been keeping a log too.” Jaebum pulls out his own small notebook, getting a smile of approval.

“When we got here it was nice but it wasn't a honeytrap like it is now.” Jaebum hated to think what it was like if this was the improved version. “She used to hurt them to make people give up the cards, to hand it all over just so they didn't have to endure.” That wasn’t surprising to him. Not with how She swung between Her moods. “There wasn't always champagne because She didn't care to keep anyone around before, didn't care to make them forget their lives before She took those two, mostly as a trophy I think, and She found out it was easier to trap flies with honey.”

Jaebum doesn't know if that's comforting, but he asks “Who were the trophies?” 

“Who do you think?” Jamie stares at him like he's stupid and Jaebum really wants her to meet Mark. “The maknaes, obviously. I didn’t get a chance to learn their names before running out, but it was the maknaes and their boyfriend.” Jaebum wonders if Jamie regrets leaving them alone with Her, or if her sense of survival is too high for that. “Anyway, She brought in the champagne to make them forget him and started tarnishing their memory.”

“Yugyeom and Bambam.” Jaebum offers. If they can’t remember who they are, he’ll remember for them. “Their names.”

She looks up at him, but moves on. “I know I’ve been here for two years because I’ve been keeping track with tally marks but I don't know how long they've been here.” Her pen scratches their names into her notebook. “I don't know how long they've been like that, but time moves differently for each person here, depends on her and the food and the champagne. Makes things hard to keep track of.”

Jaebum takes a few moments, head ready to split with the influx of new information. He had been hoping that anything about this place made coherent sense but yet again he was proven wrong.

“Have you ever seen Her outside of the ballroom? Wandering around?” Jamie shakes her head no. “Do you know where She goes when they're all away from it?” For the first time, she hesitates and then says yes in a voice so small that he nearly misses it. “Show me. Please.”

Jamie looks like she’d rather gnaw her own leg off, but she agrees. She takes him through a winding stream of hallways, passing meat rooms and empty rooms that he’s explored already as well as more than a few he hasn’t. As they walk the mission bell rings in the distance and he knows from the number of bells that it's about the time that She has to go back to the master’s chambers. It's time for a reprieve.

“This is where she goes.” Jaebum has to strain to hear Jamie’s whisper. “This is the master chamber where She goes to feast. It’s also where She keeps her prizes.” Through a window Jaebum can see ‘outside’ to a small garden area full of rotting flowers that lead up to a small building. Jamie holds a finger to his lips, shushes him before he can think to say anything. “There's a room somewhere here where She keeps the people that piss her off, but I’ve been too scared to get close to it.”

The pair of them peer around the edge of the window and they see Her walking back, leading the other four. Jackson looks hollow, Youngjae looks exhausted and beaten. They're covered in scratches and bruises and injuries. The maknaes are perfect, not a single mark on them, but they look hazy and drugged and can't walk straight. Bambam stumbles and crashes into Jackson who flinches but holds him up. Yugyeom falls against the wall and then sinks down to put his head between his knees. She coos at him and crouches, holds his face in her hands to pull it up and press kisses along his skin as she lifts him by the jaw until he's forced back onto his feet to keep walking. When they reach a room, She gives both Jackson and Youngjae a hard shove sending them stumbling in before coaxing the maknaes gently in with her. 

After that, they both leave. Jaebum needs to think. He needs to walk before he runs in and does something he can’t undo. 

“Can you get me to my room? Jamie nods and leads him in silence. 

On the way there he thinks of the meat rooms. The fact that they're still digesting but still here. He thinks of the fact that She controls everything, he thinks of how this place is part of her, or She's part of this place.The night man is her, the bartenders Her. It's all one. Maybe She just _is this place._

Jaebum thinks hard about what that means for all of them. 

Are they in her?   
Does She have them?   
If there's no place, are they free by virtue of not being in it?   
If he destroys this place, do they die with it?   
Is it better to die here than to live forever with her? 

He thinks it is and he knows that Mark and probably Jinyong would agree with him. So he thinks of the best way to take this whole fucking place down and focuses on that more than he’s ever focused before.

When they reach his room, he opens the door and it's full of flames. The papers are gone, as are the books filled with a lifetime of memories he hopes follow him into whatever afterlife comes after this. Around the room, the mirrors are melting grotesquely, glass shattering with the heat or dripping onto the carpet. As he hoped, the bed is all but ash already. Instead of running like his lizard brain is telling him to, he opens the door wider and goes in. He ignores the burning in his hands and starts to toss things out, spreading the fire faster. Grabbing the remains of a blanket, he drags the burning fabric into the hall with him.

“What are you doing?” Jaebum drags the blanket with him as Jamie screams at him. “We’re all going to die in the real world if we die here.” Jamie jumps away as he kicks open Mark’s door and throws the flaming blanket in to start the fire there. “Jb we’ll be fucking _vegetables._ We won’t ever wake up.”

Jaebum ignores her and knocks things from their shelves in the hall, rips paintings off of walls so the canvas catches before it can turn into mirrors. When he opens doors he pauses to let things light and or toss burning objects into places to speed them along. If he can get enough things on fire it’ll make sure the whole thing burns down to the ground.

“What if this doesn’t work?” Jamie plants both hands on his shoulders finally bringing him to a halt. “What happens when we’re shadows and can’t save them?”

“We can’t save them now.” Jaebum nods to a room of mirrors lit only by the fire and the person in the mirror looking at them with a smile before the glass shatters. “Sublty clearly isn’t the way. So let’s try this and if we fail, at least the next people will have a place to start.”

Jamie looks ready to argue when there's a screech, loud enough to shake the walls and pierce through all the rooms. It's coming from everywhere. Jaebum returns to his casual pace, unwilling to be cowed by Her rage or Jamie’s trepidation. The scream of pain does, however, prompt Jamie to help him. She covers her ears long enough for the scream to echo and then goes into the burning room to drag out books with her bare hands, tossing them into rooms to spread things along. 

There's another shriek and then Jackson and Youngjae are shoved out of a room. Certainly not the one they were put in. 

“She..S-she said..She’ll leave us alone if you stop.” Dazed, Youngjae stammers out, “She said we’re a peace offering.”

“No. I won’t stop, not while I’m alive.” Jaebum kneels, placing a kiss on both tear streaked cheeks before standing again. “I’m sorry, Sunshine.”

Jaebum and Jackson stare one another down and then Jackson charges forward and pulls him down into a kiss and it's not a distraction, it's not a show, and it fills him with warmth. When they break apart Jackson doesn't say anything, he just grabs a book from the nearest room and lights it up. 

From the ground Youngjae coughs, eyes watering and for a moment Jaebum worries he's going to try and stop them. Instead, he takes off down the hall and Jaebum's heart sinks but at least he's not doing anything to stop them. He keeps walking, coughing in the smoke but Jackson and Jamie are helping. When the blanket is too fucked to drag on, they get another one.

Then Youngjae is back, sprinting down the hall with bottles in his arms. He shoulders Jamie hard and tells her to help him, stop that and help him. She starts to argue but then sees that it's alcohol. A lot of it. Grinning, he drops the things in her hands and grabs a few bottles from him. It's not the wine or the champagne from the tables but whiskey and rum and vodka, things that burn. Likely taken from the bar that She brought back in an attempt to placate her assailants. 

They take those and Jamie takes a long swig before she starts going in ahead of them, splashing the walls and objects. There's more screaming, shrieking. As they get closer to the ballroom they see her, beastly and massive and furious. The maknaes are in her hands, fingers digging into their flesh. They’re soaked and unconscious and the smell of champagne makes it through the smoke. 

“You _fucking gnats_. You can’t have them back.” The veneer of human chips away more and Jaebum would be horrified but he can see the spots on her body where fire has charred the skin. “You'll never find Mark and Jinyoung before it’s too late, they'll never make it out. You’ve doomed them too.”

From behind him, Jackson steps up and grabs a bottle from Youngjae. With shaking hands, Jackson stuffs a sock into it and starts to tip it. 

“You took everything anyway.” Jackson’s voice is sharp, the most sober that Jaebum has ever heard him. “You took my fiance. You took my memory.” Another defiant step forward even as She snarls like no animal any of them have ever heard. “You took the only things that made this place fucking bearable you miserable _bitch._ ” He holds the bottle over the blanket behind Jaebum and then slings it forward to shatter over her. “Even if we never get out, I'd rather die than stay.”

The glass rains down like glitter in the fire, liquor splashing on the maknaes but they don't do anything. They don't move. They say nothing.

She shrieks and runs into the ballroom, lights the place even more with each step she takes. 

The maknaes burn but he can't save them, any of them. They're all going to die. He hopes that if he meets them again in the afterlife, they’ll forgive him for this. That they won’t hate him for doing the only thing he could think to do.

Instead of following Her into the ballroom that finally burns like the hell pit it’s always been, he goes and sits with the two boys who were so brave for so long. The place is too far gone to be saved and there’s no one who will put it out. The smoke was burning his chest anyway. Jackson comes over and sits in his lap, pulls Yugyeom to him and holds him while they burn together. Youngjae takes a long drink and then lays with Bambam, one hand tangled with Jaebum’s. 

Jamie keeps burning things, years of rage finally given an outlet.

Closing his eyes, Jaebum sings to them until the smoke chokes him out and he drifts off with the cinders floating around him.

.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Be-beep. Be-beep._

Jaebum wakes up slowly. Groggy. The room is white and there's beeping that slowly increases as he wakes until it’s shrieking in time with how his heart is smashing against his chest. 

Next to him, someone sobs while another shouts. He can't make out the words, his head is throbbing too much to be able to translate the syllables into anything meaningful. The smell of smoke is still in his nose and something is in his throat. His body aches.

“Beommie?” His mom’s voice is soft as he pries his eyes open to little slits. “Hang on baby. The doctor is coming.”

The next few hours are a blur. The thing in his throat is a tube and they pull it out carefully. His mother is there, always hovering at the edge of things while the doctors run test after test after test. He takes it as a victory that he remembers her. 

Mark's family is there but quiet, subdued in a way that frightens him because it's so NOT them. They’re all fragile, but take time to come kiss his forehead and whisper they’re glad he’s alive. Jaebum takes it as another victory that remembers them too. 

It takes hours more until his throat is loose enough to rasp out, “Mark?” 

“He's not awake, but he's alive.” His mom pulls back a curtain and there he fucking is, red hair grown out and face gaunt and body thin but beautiful and real. “They took him off the tube a few days ago, but you were having trouble breathing so they left it in.” His mom brushes some hair from Mark’s forehead. “Do you remember what happened?”

“N-no.” Jaebum shakes his head, wincing at the sandpaper in his throat. “Mark had...I don’t…”

“It’s okay baby.” Jaebum blinks back tears as She tells him about the accident.

He and Mark have both been in a coma for three weeks. The train they had been on was hit by a landslide while they were travelling upstate to talk to a company about signing Jaebum on as part time music producer. It was something that was supposed to bring them to Cali a few months out of the year so that they could make money and Mark could see his family outside of weekly skype calls. 

He isn’t particularly surprised that it’s only been three weeks when it felt like an eternity, they had all agreed time moved differently. It also made sense to him now that he was confirmed in a coma while being out of his room, his own fucking head, made him forget things. He had been actively dying each time he left for long periods.

“Did Jackson wake up?” Jaebum tried to lift himself but his muscles seemed unwilling to agree with him. “Or Yugyeom? Bambam? Youngjae?”

“Who are you talking about?” She frowns. “People from the train?” 

Before he gets an answer, there's beeping and movement and Mark is waking up and everyone is scrambling. Mostly because Mark, his dear beloved idiot, is waking trying to throw a punch. It takes three nurses to hold Mark’s weak ass down as his husband starts to realize he’s in the real world. A powerful combination of his mom telling him to knock his shit off, and Jaebum laughing at him is enough to jolt Mark out of his haze.

“You crazy bastard.” The words are raspy, most of the vowels cracking but Mark is smiling at him. “Goddamn, I love you so much.”

“Love you too babe.” Jaebum blinks past the tears. Even if the rest didn’t make it, he and Mark did. “Be nice to the nurses.”

They’re alive and Jaebum is hit with how _much_ he missed Mark. If Mark hadn’t been in that shitty place Jaebum isn’t sure he would have had the will to keep going. The part of him that fancies himself brave and heroic says that he would have. Even if Mark hadn’t been there, Jackson and Youngjae and the maknaes were. He wouldn’t have been able to just disappear into nothingness while he knew they were all suffering. He wouldn’t have been able to live with himself in this life or the next.

While Mark begins his battery of tests, Jaebum asks Mark's sister who's at his side, “Can...can you help me?” She looks at him confused. “I just..can you look up a few names for me?” 

“Yeah, sure.” Pulling out her phone she waits.

“Um.” Jaebum wracks his brain trying to remember surnames but he realizes he only knows two. “Jackson Wang? Kim Yugyeom? Please.” 

She does, thumbs tapping away on the phone screen and then raises her brows, eyes going owl wide. “There...there's an article about Jackson Wang. A rapper who was in a plane crash a month ago. He's been in a coma, but his fiance died after a few hours in the hospital. A Choi Youngjae survived the same crash and is also in a coma, he's a professional gamer.” Mark’s sister frowns deeper, eyes flicking up to him and then back down. “Kim Yugyeom has an article too, he’s a dancer and aspiring singer, his boyfriend an actor, a second boyfriend - I think I saw this one.” Another few taps on the screen and she’s nodding. “Yeah, I did. They were in a car accident. All three have been in a coma for eight months.” 

Jaebum wipes the tears. It happened. It was real. And now he has to find them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Say hi to us on Tumblr!  
> https://bang-channies.tumblr.com/
> 
> hey kids we got a twitter:  
> S - https://twitter.com/hardstansonly  
> K - https://twitter.com/BChannies
> 
> Give Rae some love too:  
> https://twitter.com/6uglyguysandjae

**Author's Note:**

> Say hi to us on Tumblr!  
> https://bang-channies.tumblr.com/
> 
> hey kids we got a twitter:  
> S - https://twitter.com/hardstansonly  
> K - https://twitter.com/BChannies
> 
> Give Rae some love too:  
> https://twitter.com/6uglyguysandjae


End file.
